On Wed, 11 Aug 2004 19:35:59 -0700, James Dugan <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>----------------------Someday you will be 54 young lady.   Isn't he a
smoker??  It can make a difference.  A lot of it is attitude.  If it's
really something that interests you  I think you don't notice the less
pleasant aspects surrounding what you are involved in.  Is his reaction to
conditions consistent all along since you have known him?  Has he grown out
of his love for skiing or is his attitude the same now as it has been all
along?  Some people are fair weather golfers and others can't let a day go
by without golfing even if it's raining or snowing.
>I love my man, but I really don't love taking him on ski vacation with me
>too much, unless there's a group of less-than-expert skiers for him to hang
>out with (like when we went to Banff, KMS, Fernie). I would rather go with
>the more hard-core skiers and he would prefer the other.
>---------------------------------Be careful you don't love ski vacations
_more_ than your man.  You might think of taking some less than four
diamond runs with him occasionally.  But if he really doesn't care and just
sends you on your way with the checkbook and says have fun then what the
heck.  Maybe you should dump him and lock up with some 25 year old noo
skool corporate sponsored stud who can take you with him all over the world
on his movie shoots.

Thanks for calling me 'young lady', even though it was pedantic.

Yeah, he's a fair weather skier (and kayaker). He toughed out some cold
days, but now he's not willing, or I can take him and listen to him whine,
or meet him in the bar when I'm done. I do take easier runs with him,
that's why I telemark. When he got involved with me, he knew that skiing
was my passion (and that I'm 13 yrs younger than he is), and he tried to
make it his own. First had to learn to ski. He's come a long way in 8
years. Last year I only skied with him less than half of the 61 days I
skied. Of course I wish he were out there with me, but not if he's not
having fun. Sure we had some good days, but most of them he ended a few
hours before I did.

In the last 2 yrs his interest in skiing and kayaking has waned, so, I
considered the possibility of dumping him for someone who shared my
passions (there are plenty of available men out there who ski and kayak,
rich ones too!!;-). Then I realized, there aren't too many guys like him
who would set me free to do what I want when I want and still be home to
love me when I got back. He is truly a special man. There was no reason to
dump him, just reason to find others to share my passion, and that is why I
participate on this list! I realized last year that we are wasting his time
and money going on big ski trips together, so it makes sense for me to go
without him. I know he'll be there when I get back. Our love and trust has
been tested and had not been broken. I think we are pretty solid, even
though we have different interests. Ironic, though, because so many men
complain that their S.O.s don't ski or enjoy the things that they do. For
years I searched for someone to share these experiences and I ended up with
a guy who gave it a try, kinda liked it, but not as much as I do. He'd
rather stay home and work on the house. I can't complain about that. He's
more of a craftsman than an adventurer, though he's certainly had his share
of adventure in his lifetime (23 yrs in the army, spent all over the world).

I'm just thrilled that he is going to meet me in AZ and go on the Grand
Canyon with me in March. I am grateful for what I have and no longer
wishing for what I don't.


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