I very often send private notes to people who I think need some encouragement to moderate what they say in some way, a practice I intend to continue as long as I continue as moderator.
Michael Balter just deliberately posted my private message to him to the list along with his reply. I consider that out of bounds. Each of us has the right to send private messages, and the recipient should not intentionally make them public without permission. It happens to be illegal to to do that, as well, and I don't see why even socialists should not respect the right to retain that kind of control over one's words.