Here is a sharply drawn statement, published last year by a local group of activists. It may give you some useful ideas.
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The attack on public education is one aspect of a larger attack on the public sector and on democracy more generally, where corporate interests now dominate political, social, and economic decisions. Occupy
Wall Street has reshaped the debate over this country’s direction with the demand that the destruction of our communities and our earth resulting from corporatization must end: we seek something entirely different.
Occupy Education Northern California shares these broad goals and believes that we need more than simply increased funding for public education. The problems with education are deeply linked to and cannot be treated separately from racism; privatization; global economic competition rather than cooperation; and lack of access to food, housing, and healthcare. In order to address these issues, we must change the conditions in which students live and learn and provide them with tools to reimagine and reclaim their futures. Furthermore, education must prepare students to be empowered participants in a democratic community and to take respectful care of each other and of the planet.
To these ends, this is our vision:
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I looked at the Mission Statement. I see what you mean about it being written as being against things instead of for them. I think it could be reformatted and still make the same points strongly. I would like a stronger focus on equality for example.
On the call last night Larry recommended we all review and reflect on the original mission statement for SftP as it was presented by Katherine Yih in her excellent informative talk at the reunion conference.
This is it, from the pdf on the site-- http://science-for-the-people.org/science-and-ideology-with-video/
SftP mission statementSftP is an organization of people involved or interested inscience and technology-related issues, whose activitiesare directed at1) exposing the class control of science and technology,2) organizing campaigns which criticize, challenge andpropose alternatives to the uses of science andtechnology, and3) developing a political strategy by which people inthe technical strata can ally with other progressiveforces in society.SftP opposes the ideologies of sexism, racism, elitism,and their practice, and holds an anti-imperialist world-view.
In the discussion last night it was agreed that we would like to work together on putting forth a positive and action vision- mission statement for the revitalized movement, and that we would begin by reviewing the original statement.